When Bad Things Happen: The Stockholm Attack & Earthquakes in Philippines…

This post will be in English as it is the best way for me to express what I want to say today.

I was not raised in Sweden but I am living in the Capital, Stockholm. I have lived most of my life abroad and since moving here, I have had my challenges with the people and culture of my own citizenship. I have always felt the disconnect and conservative behavior and especially being a Swede but not being considered one has always made it difficult for me to consider Sweden home…However. The behavior and feeling yesterday was completely different. The love and support of strangers taking in people and offering help or lending a hand is indescribable.

Just out of a meeting with two fantastic women, I planned on taking the metro home or to Åhléns since I was there yesterday and did an oxygen boost at Elizabeth Ardens new stand.  I wanted to try the detox but while standing in one of the trams I decided to just continue on home instead and do the boost next week instead. Just as I stepped out of the tram, my phone started exploding. Just short messages of panic: “Where are you?” “Are you at Åhléns?” “Are you ok?”… I learnt that the lorry rammed right into the beauty department at Åhléns City. Where I was just deciding not to go.

I have friends and loved ones that work at Åhléns and my first reaction was to try to get a hold of them. I know that phones are a no-no on the floor and Åhléns has good management that would take care of their people. Now it was the waiting game. How will those trapped in stores or nearby get home? By not jumping off the tram at that time, I missed those minutes. I was close by. Safe…but not safe. A feeling of not knowing but knowing that people were reaching out and helping in any way they could. I am thankful to the kindness of strangers, the police, medical teams and other moving parts that rushed to the scene when we all were trying to get as far away as possible.

And.. on the other side of the world, My parents experiencing the ground below them shaking with tremors from the Earthquakes in the Philippines. I recently learnt that there was a 5.2 magnitude hit South of Manila and the effects are still unknown. My parents are truly fantastic at coping through the crazy rainfalls and mother nature doing her thing..but being so far away from them and the uncertainty of if the Earthquakes would get worse or cause Tsunamis is worrisome.

The only point I want to get across in this post is that the world is just under so much pressure…Whether it is environmental, political, personal.. It is important to keep your close ones close and have perspective. Everyone reacts differently to situations so be considerate, be critical but have understanding and most importantly, support each other. We have enough hate in the world as it is.

❤️ Life is precious. Take care of each other. ❤️

 

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Support Saturday | You Are Enough

Support Saturday is all about spreading some love and support for others! For example, I may do interviews with other bloggers or maybe introduce a video that has inspired me. I won’t do this every Saturday but once in a while if you, my readers, like the idea!

As you may know, I have personally been going through a lot lately and to add on to it, I got hit with a bad cold. I believe it came with the stress of the past week. A lot of this week is all about growth and self acceptance instead of the usual beautiful makeups, collections and hauls so I do hope that you readers are OK with that and are on board with the changes I want to put into my blog.

Today I wanted to share a video from The Stay at Home Chef who inspired me a number of weeks back and I think we all need to take a step back and think about the message she has perfectly portrayed here.

“Just a suggestion.”

I love the recipes that The Stay at Home Chef posts and when she took the time to respond to a comment (that may or may not have had any malice behind it) her response really inspired me to rethink the way I talk to people and the way I respond online. Maybe it was just a suggestion but the old saying of “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about, be kind!” rings true.

My struggle has a lot to do with the way I speak in Swedish. I get called out on it since I do have an american accent when I speak. I’ve been called Tony Irving too often (I take it as a compliment since he is a good person) but it does hurt and it does bother me. Instead of recognizing the struggle I went through in moving to a “foreign” country alone and learnt a full language in less than a year and that they actually can hold a full conversation with me… most people I meet focus on how “strange/weird/bad” I speak and make fun of it.

I also struggled with my weight. I gained a lot of weight when I moved to Sweden because I was not happy and from being fully active in team sports daily to not moving at all of course I gained over 30 kgs and have struggled still to get rid of it. I’ve come in contact with people who would rather point out that I am over weight than ask themselves why I’m overweight. There are so many reasons that I can take in another post and just as long as I accept myself as how I am and how I look, it shouldn’t be something to point out to me. I know how I look like.

These are just two examples but quite dominant ones in my daily life. I too have stretch marks all over my body, I have very battered up ankles. I have bags under my eyes, I have the 11 between my brows and I am self conscious of my round asian cheeks. I have nails that are so brittle and I can continue to point out every little detail of my being but. I AM OK with it. My stretch marks are there because I grew quickly. I battered up my ankles because I was enjoying being a part of sport teams. I use my brows to express myself and my round asian cheeks are most prominent when Im smiling and Id rather smile than be sad!

Improve your Self Image & think positive!

Like anything else that doesn’t come naturally, take the time and practice! By being able to develop the mindset of positive encouragement towards yourself, you are able to respond in the same way to others and your surroundings.

Here are a few ways to create a more positive mindset by focusing on the right approaches to a better self image:

  • Stop the Negative! When you start beating down on yourself, say stop! If you find this one hard, I actually started by sounding like a crazy person and saying “Stop it!” out loud. If someone insults another person, do you allow them to do so? I have always been one to tell them to stop so why wouldn’t you do the same for your internal voice?
  • Stop the Second Guessing! Shoulda Woulda Coulda right? Nope! You made that choice for a reason and if it didn’t work, it didn’t work. Move On. If you are second guessing yourself, take a new choice. Do something about it. Focus on doing what you can do and not what you can’t do or what you can’t change. This also tunes very much into guilt and responsibility. Don’t feel guilty for feeling the way you do and take responsibility for your feelings.
  • Exaggerations are just that. Exaggerations. “I’m never good enough.” So not true! “I never get picked.” Still not true! These are just some examples of exaggerations. You have been good enough. You have been picked for something before. When you think of an exaggeration, question it. Is it really true?
  • Treat yourself kindly. You have the right to criticize yourself but you also have the right to treat yourself with respect.You cannot change the past but can learn from it. Painful memories and feelings will exist and by seeing them as just memories will give you the opportunity to forgive.
  • Acceptance. The hardest part. Focus on what you can be and not what you are not. Accept flaws and accept that being perfect is not humanly possible. Give yourself a break! You decide how to live your life and you are doing it to your best ability! Monty Phytons “Always look on the Bright Side of Life” is a good quote to think of here. By mentally choosing positive interpretations of comments and events would make it easier to grow as a person and have better self image.
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