Support Saturday | You Are Enough

Support Saturday is all about spreading some love and support for others! For example, I may do interviews with other bloggers or maybe introduce a video that has inspired me. I won’t do this every Saturday but once in a while if you, my readers, like the idea!

As you may know, I have personally been going through a lot lately and to add on to it, I got hit with a bad cold. I believe it came with the stress of the past week. A lot of this week is all about growth and self acceptance instead of the usual beautiful makeups, collections and hauls so I do hope that you readers are OK with that and are on board with the changes I want to put into my blog.

Today I wanted to share a video from The Stay at Home Chef who inspired me a number of weeks back and I think we all need to take a step back and think about the message she has perfectly portrayed here.

“Just a suggestion.”

I love the recipes that The Stay at Home Chef posts and when she took the time to respond to a comment (that may or may not have had any malice behind it) her response really inspired me to rethink the way I talk to people and the way I respond online. Maybe it was just a suggestion but the old saying of “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about, be kind!” rings true.

My struggle has a lot to do with the way I speak in Swedish. I get called out on it since I do have an american accent when I speak. I’ve been called Tony Irving too often (I take it as a compliment since he is a good person) but it does hurt and it does bother me. Instead of recognizing the struggle I went through in moving to a “foreign” country alone and learnt a full language in less than a year and that they actually can hold a full conversation with me… most people I meet focus on how “strange/weird/bad” I speak and make fun of it.

I also struggled with my weight. I gained a lot of weight when I moved to Sweden because I was not happy and from being fully active in team sports daily to not moving at all of course I gained over 30 kgs and have struggled still to get rid of it. I’ve come in contact with people who would rather point out that I am over weight than ask themselves why I’m overweight. There are so many reasons that I can take in another post and just as long as I accept myself as how I am and how I look, it shouldn’t be something to point out to me. I know how I look like.

These are just two examples but quite dominant ones in my daily life. I too have stretch marks all over my body, I have very battered up ankles. I have bags under my eyes, I have the 11 between my brows and I am self conscious of my round asian cheeks. I have nails that are so brittle and I can continue to point out every little detail of my being but. I AM OK with it. My stretch marks are there because I grew quickly. I battered up my ankles because I was enjoying being a part of sport teams. I use my brows to express myself and my round asian cheeks are most prominent when Im smiling and Id rather smile than be sad!

Improve your Self Image & think positive!

Like anything else that doesn’t come naturally, take the time and practice! By being able to develop the mindset of positive encouragement towards yourself, you are able to respond in the same way to others and your surroundings.

Here are a few ways to create a more positive mindset by focusing on the right approaches to a better self image:

  • Stop the Negative! When you start beating down on yourself, say stop! If you find this one hard, I actually started by sounding like a crazy person and saying “Stop it!” out loud. If someone insults another person, do you allow them to do so? I have always been one to tell them to stop so why wouldn’t you do the same for your internal voice?
  • Stop the Second Guessing! Shoulda Woulda Coulda right? Nope! You made that choice for a reason and if it didn’t work, it didn’t work. Move On. If you are second guessing yourself, take a new choice. Do something about it. Focus on doing what you can do and not what you can’t do or what you can’t change. This also tunes very much into guilt and responsibility. Don’t feel guilty for feeling the way you do and take responsibility for your feelings.
  • Exaggerations are just that. Exaggerations. “I’m never good enough.” So not true! “I never get picked.” Still not true! These are just some examples of exaggerations. You have been good enough. You have been picked for something before. When you think of an exaggeration, question it. Is it really true?
  • Treat yourself kindly. You have the right to criticize yourself but you also have the right to treat yourself with respect.You cannot change the past but can learn from it. Painful memories and feelings will exist and by seeing them as just memories will give you the opportunity to forgive.
  • Acceptance. The hardest part. Focus on what you can be and not what you are not. Accept flaws and accept that being perfect is not humanly possible. Give yourself a break! You decide how to live your life and you are doing it to your best ability! Monty Phytons “Always look on the Bright Side of Life” is a good quote to think of here. By mentally choosing positive interpretations of comments and events would make it easier to grow as a person and have better self image.
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Monday Matters: The Art of Bouncing Back

You wanted more personal posts so I created Monday Matters! Every monday I will try to talk about everything under the sun that matters. Today’s topic is the Art of Boucning Back.

Monday Matters

It took a day for me to write this post, hence why it’s going up on a Tuesday but I needed the time to process and to forumlate my words correctly. I had an extremely tough day yesterday.  I personally don’t take advice from people who just don’t understand as they have not been there but let me share my experiences and I hope that maybe you’d be able to share yours and we can be a support system for each other dispite differences.

I started my year by being laid off work. Is this a taboo subject?

Just a few months ago I was so excited to embark on a new career as an Online Sales Manager and though I had a bit of a learning curve to tackle, I felt I was able to accomplish quite a bit in such a short time. Unfortunately the company could not keep me due to some restructuring and I have a two week notice. Not even. Panic mode. Sitting in my new boss’ office, trying to be strong then realizing that I’m a crier. So be it. She offered the rest of the day and the morning after and I took it.

I’ve never been laid off before nor knew how to process it. I don’t have to stay the two weeks if I don’t want to. It didn’t matter. I couldn’t stop the tears and disappointment in myself. The sympathy I don’t want from my coworkers. The shame I felt for leaving such an amazing job, with amazing coworkers and a good salary for this job. The failure I am for not being good enough for them to want to keep me.

Ok. So. normal right? Who wouldn’t feel that way?

In hindsight, I wasn’t surprised. I think my position was created just for the website project. Projects are between 3 months to a year. I had a feeling that it was coming. I think I wanted the job and maybe more time. Time to have found another job. Time to have accomplished more. Time to have showed them I was worth keeping.

I named this Monday Matters “The art of bouncing back” because, though I found out yesterday, I haven’t been more clear and wanted to share what I did to get over the initial shock.

  • Take Time. Taking the day and the morning after was the best thing I could have done for my sanity.
  • If you’re the strong type, asking for help is not the easiest. Finding out who you can put your trust in and knowing they’d be there even if you’re not perfect is not easy but you need to put yourself out there.
  • I have always been good at not sharing much of my internal struggle and finding the ones who were able to see right through it is what got me through the past few hours.
  • Even though I’m still hurting, the general rule of “fake it till you make it” applies true. By plastering that smile and responding, I’m able to feel like myself.

Bounce Back!

  • I woke up this morning with a determination and clearness to just be grateful. I’m still very sad but being grateful for the next breath of air, for the sun being out today, for the boyfriend who held me all night till I stopped crying.
  • I meditated. It’s been years since. I again, took time. Time to stop myself from destructing. Realizing that I cannot control the happenings around me but I could control how I’m reacting to them.
  • I then started writing this post. Theraputic and hopefully helpful as well.

Now what?

Well. Life goes on. I’m putting this out there and maybe one of you has been in a similar situation.
Share your experiences, leave some advice. Let me know your thoughts on my new Monday Matters theme!

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Say Hello to the Flags!

As you may have noticed, the blog is still down. I’m working out the glitches but I have finally gotten my language problem solved. You can switch between English & Swedish by pressing on the flags that you find in the menu bar and or on the side menu!

Let me know which one you like the best and or if I should keep them both?

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✨ A Thankyou / YouTube Turning 7 this year! ✨

As you may/may not know. I started a YouTube channel, 7 YEARS AGO. It was something that I started to gain new friends and to be able to talk beauty with people. Back then YouTube wasn’t revenue based and channels were driven, edited and created by anyone and becoming a partner was a-heck-of-a-lot-of-difficult! After a year, I was so proud to have made partner! It took 4 rejections before then haha. Then my channel gained more momentum and then after a few years… I moved to Stockholm.

It was a tough move, relationships became difficult to hold, my life became hectic and I had to deal with a lot of performance anxiety. So I stopped & I prioritized. I stopped posting on YouTube and continued on my blog instead. This was 2 years ago. And just this past month, my stalled YouTube Channel filled 7 years old and I have 1000 subscribers. Since day 1: I’d rather gain new friends and be able to dedicate my time to each individual so thank you to those who have subscribed, despite me not posting the past 2 years. I am glad that the content I posted has still been actual and that throughout the past 2 years, the comments have rolled in & we’ve kept contact. So. Thank you. Thankyou for the support. For the comments. For clicking on subscribe. For just being a beauty lover like me.

With that. I have been itching to jumpstart my YouTube Channel but I’m not sure if there’s an interest anymore. Let me know in the comments if there is and if so, what would you like to see?

Shall we rewind back to that awkward “first” tutorial? *HAHA* I just caann’t!! Those skills though! hahaha

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